I dialed a number and got the following recording:
“I am not available right now, but thank you for caring enough to
call. I am making some changes in my life. Please leave a message
after the beep. If I do not return your call, you are one of the
At pilot’s training back in the Air Corps they taught us,
“Always try to keep the number of landings you make
equal to the number of take offs you make.”
Little Tommy had been to a birthday party at a friend’s house.
Knowing his sweet tooth, Tommy’s mother looked straight into his eyes
“I hope you didn’t ask for a second piece of cake.”
“No, but I asked Mrs. Smith for the recipe so you could make some
like it, and she gave me two more pieces without asking.”
Aspire to inspire before you expire.
My wife and I had words,
but I didn’t get to use mine.
As my five year old son and I were headed to McDonald’s one day, we
passed a car accident. Usually when we see something terrible like
that, we say a prayer for those who might be hurt, so I pointed and
said to my son,
“We should pray.”
From the back seat I heard his earnest request:
“Please, God, don’t let those cars block the entrance to McDonald’s.”
Frustration is trying to find your glasses without your glasses.
Blessed are those who can give without remembering
and take without forgetting.
The irony of life is that, by the time you’re old enough to know your
you’re not going anywhere.
God made man before woman so as to give him time to think
of an answer for her first question.
I was always taught to respect my elders,
but it keeps getting harder to find one.
Every morning is the dawn of a new error.